In the 1970's NASA began to expiriment with the use of training brain waves for the treatment of neurological disorders such as epilepsy. When clients were taught to relax the prevalence of their seizures were reduced.

Subsequent research began to show a reduction in symptoms for those coping with AD/HD. New attention training was brought into focus and soon utlized on children to teach them to create and maintain a calm state.

So what is it?

 Due to increasing coverage in major publications like Discover, Time and Newsweek, neurofeedback has become a popular, albeit controversial, intervention used for the treatment of behavior disorders. Scientists have known for many years that the brain emits various brain waves that are indicatives of the electrical activity of the brain. Different types of brain waves are emitted depending on whether the person is in a focused and attentive state or a drowsy/daydream state. Neurofeedback allows a person to view these brain waves on a computer screen as they occur. By teaching a person to produce the brain waves patterns associated with a relaxed, alert and focused state, and then practicing this skill for many hours, neurofeedback practitioners believe that individuals with these disorders can learn to maintain this state. As a result, many symptoms will diminish. However, the benefits of neurofeedback still cause controversy among scientists as a reputable source of treatment.

How is it conducted?

A typical clinical session of neurofeedback training for a child involves pasting electrodes {sensors that pick up the electrical activity of the brain} to the head with a conductive gel. This is a completely painless process. Wires from this electrodes are connected to a device that amplifies the small signal from the electrodes. The child sits in a comfortable chair and watches a computer monitor. The monitor displays a picture, such as a moving graph, that indicates the degree to which the child is producing the desired pattern of brainwave activity. The goal is for the child to learn to produce the type of brain wave activity associated with a focused and attentive state.

Over the course of numerous training sessions, it may gradually become easier for the child to achieve and maintain this state for longer periods of time. Supporters of  neurofeedback often describe this training as an exercise program for the brain. The training continues until the child is able to consistently achieve and maintain a pattern that shows a relaxed and attentive state.

How much will this cost us?

Neurofeedback typically requires 40 to 60 sessions, with sessions ranging from $40 to $120. The sessions are typically conducted 2-3 time per week.  Some insurance companies will cover the cost of some or all of the treatments with a prescription.

For that price does it really work?

EEG biofeedback is not a "cure" for ADHD, Autism or Anxiety. Nevertheless, there is an increasing body of evidence that it leads to "normalization"{especially for ADHD children} of behavior and can enhance the long-term academic performance, social functioning, and overall life adjustment of your child.

However, there have not been consistant studies on the use of neurofeedback for these disorders. There have been many mixed reviews as to the benefits. 

With the high expense and the length of time it takes to reach maximum potential this treatment might not be suitable for most families. But for those who have the resources and can comitt to the time neurofeedback is a worthwhile treatment to explore.

Ever since I was young I've had an infatuation with holistic healing. My father who was diagnosed with prostate cancer when I was 11 was given two years to live. He refused to go the traditional route of chemotherapy and instead developed a holistic program through diet, healing touch, herbs and meditation that allowed him to live another 18 years.

So when I was looking into treatment options with Cameron I took into consideration the benefits of the holistic healing route. One of the fascinating techniques I encountered was EFT {Emotional Freedom Technique}. Through a series of tapping along engegy {pressure} points an individual can lesson their depression, anxiety and encourage a calming state. EFT is also extremely helpful in changing behavior patterns.

 Through research on EFT I ran into an impressive product. Tappy the bear. Tappy allows children to get the  same benefits as tapping on energy points on themselves by tapping on the same points on the bear. It relaxes the child through the motions of tapping and allows them to become comfortable with the points so they may eventually be able to use it on themselves.

Tappy bear has been met with great affection in our household. Cameron often uses him to calm himself down before going to bed and after large temper tantrums. We've slowly been working on integrating him into his coping skills as soon as he becomes agitated. I think with more practice and time he'll be able regulate his emotions more easily using tappy.

I've been very happy with the progress Cameron has made using Tappy and I am thrilled that we found such a valuable tool.

Check Tappy Bear out for yourself at http://www.tappybear.com/blog/

Hearing the diagnosis of your child's disability is overwhelming. Your wonderful child is now officially different from the majority of the population. Imaging what your child will have to go through in the coming years makes it all the more difficult.

Often times parents experience the a form of grief as their dreams for what the future should've held are shattered.

When Cameron was diagnosed I found myself moving through a range of intense emotions. One day I would be crying for the pain he will endure, the next day I would be angry at the world for doing this to us.

My son will struggle through school. It is difficult for him to maintain friendships with kids who do not also have special needs. It's hard for him to attend birthday parties. I question if he'll be able to go to prom, have good relationships with friends, even graduate high school.

I recently spent some time with a friend of mine's 11 year old daughter. Although she is only two years older than Cameron it was a completely different experience. There were no mood swings, we were able to go to stores with out temper tantrums or hyper active behaviors. I went home and was sad for myself. Sad for what I would not experience with my own son.

I feel guilty for feeling that way. I try hard to appreciate the good times and overlook the bad but it's challanging. I want for him to have it easier-- I want for all of us to have it easier.

Grieving the loss of normalcy is not often discussed. I think parents, much like I did, feel ashamed of these feelings. They feel that they don't have the right to compare and contrast their child to others and be saddended by what they will miss out on. But it's okay to feel this way. It's natural.

Joanne Woolsey {from the book Extraordinary Kids by Cheri Fuller and Louise Tucker Jones} is often called on to counsel parents of newborn Down babies. She tells them how much families come to love children with special needs — it seems to be universal. But she also tells them it's okay to grieve. "You have to grieve for the child you were expecting before you can accept the child you have," she says.

Some stages of grief that you might experience are:

• Denial. I can't believe this is happening to me.
• Anxiety. How can I possibly handle this?
• Fear. What will happen to my child and my family?
• Guilt. What did I do to cause this?
• Depression. My hopes and dreams seem to be lost forever.
• Anger. This isn't fair!
• Acceptance. I don't like what has happened. I don't understand why it happened. I don't know how I'm going to handle this.

It's common for parents to experience a all of the stages or just a few of them. Finding yourself stuck in one stage is also normal. Bouncing from stage to stage can happen as well.

So what can parents do?

The first step is to recognize the grieving cycles and know that it is okay to feel this way. Seeking help from a loved one or even a therapist can help the process along.

For some parents {like me} the grieving never stops but if you arm yourself with knowledge and tools to help you through can make the process a lot easier on the whole family.

To Homeschool or Not To Homeschool

Would Your Child Benefit from being Homeschooled?



In life there are plenty of things to feel guilty about; little white lies told to ensure that you don't offend someone, feeling like you can't spend enough time with your child because of work, or even eating that extra peice of chocolate cake. But what I wasn't prepared to feel guilty for was the nagging feeling is was my fault my child has a disability.

For the most part pregnancies are met with the anticipation of a good delivery and healthy baby. Upon delivery parents do a quick scan of the child checking for ten fingers, ten toes and if unknown, a check of the genitals to determine gender. A positive check is met with a sense of relief and gracious thanks for such beautiful a child.

However, for many reasons a child comes into the world not equally equipped as most others. Either immediately or with in the first years of life we become increasingly aware of our child's differences.

With Cameron it wasn't until he was 4 that we noticed he was different than other kids. I was shocked that I became a parent of a special needs child. And my first reaction was to beat myself up over what I might have done to cause this.

In my head I created a list of the things I did right and those that I might have done wrong. Things that I ate that I shouldn't have, that one glass of wine in the third trimester, perhaps that dip in the hot tub.

Like a record, they played over and over. My heart broke for him to have such a failure of a mother.

 Logically, I knew that it was not my fault. My child was dealt these cards and sometimes the world is just that cruel, but the rest of me; my heart, felt ashamed that my genetics threw a wrench in what could've been a perfect design.

My family had kept their history so quiet that I was completely unprepared for the possibility that this could happen to my own child--or me for that matter.

But my response to Cameron's disabilties goes beyond guilt. I felt compelled to counteract his situation by by undertaking heroic actions. In order to compensate for his disability I found myself pampering him and catering to his every whim. Yet, it never relieved the guilt and left me burned out. The stress of being everything to him 24/7 while raising another child and fostering my marriage was immense.

I shouldn't have been pitying him, I should've been helping him to develop his potential. This type of behavior on my part only allowed him to continue his inappropriate behavior patterns.

I wanted desperately to irradicate my guilt and give myself permission to know that these things sometimes just happen and that if there were a way to prevent it, I would've done everything in my power to do so.

It's scary to take that leap and believe that your child will not grow up and resent you for "doing this to him", that he will understand that we all have our crosses to bear.

But getting there takes time, it take acceptance and sometimes a good therapist but you can do it.

With the guidance of a therapist I have slowly come to terms with this guilt. I am in a far more accepting place than I was when I started but I have to work hard each day to remind myself that I am not to blame.

I don't know that the guilt will ever go away completely but I do know that I have stopped pitying my son and allowing him to do what he can for himself. I realized can be his hero without catering to him night and day.

Parent of special needs kids are not perfect. We try our best to deal with an unfortunate set of circumstances and not drown in our extra responsibilities.

Do you feel guilt for your son or daughter's disability?

We noticed a change in Cameron around the time he turned 4. The content-ness and happiness wore off and was replaced by relentless hyper activity, temper tantrums that would last hours, insomnia that kept us awake each night. Having never experienced his terrible twos we assumed he was a little late with his development and was finally reaching a stage where he was testing boundaries and seeking independence.

But then 5 came and his anger turned to rage. His pre-school and daycare were witnessing chairs being thrown, random inconsolable crying spells and increased hyperactivity that left him unable to participate in the day's lessons.

Next thing we knew we were faced with Kindergarten. Hoping that more structure during the day would help him focus we never could've anticipated what was to come. Naively, we thought he would eventually grow out of this defiant stage, but we were wrong. His hyperactivity spiraled out of control. He would spend his days crawling around the classroom, running recklessly through hallways and defying all the teacher's instructions. His rages increased and would occur multiple times in a day. Things got so severe that he was suspended twice in one month.

We sought help first with our pediatrician who agreed whole heartedly that he suffered from AD/HD and prescribed Concerta. It helped some but made him extremely agitated and almost increased his hyperactivity. We made the rounds through, Ritialin and then Adderall each making his behavior increasingly worse. Exhausted and suspecting a mood disorder the pediatrician prescribed Depakote. But that was as far as he was willing to take it, we needed a psychiatrist to move any further.

The psychiatrist's first impressions was that he had a combination of ADHD and Pervasive Developmental Delay{a form of autism} and Mood Disorder-Not otherwise specified. She left him on the Depakote and prescribed Clonidine to manage the ADHD.

Clonidine worked moderately. It was enough that he could focus for short periods at a time at school, but not enough that we noticed a significant change. The Depakote seemed to not touch his rapid mood swings and rages.

In April 2009, we were faced with the unthinkable. In a heart wrenching conversation with Cameron he confessed that he had been hearing voices from two little boys who lived in his bedroom ceiling. They would talk to him when he was in there telling him to do horrific things. They told him he should cut himself in half with a knife, steal the car and crash it, throw the dog off the deck, hurt kids at school. He also said he was seeing horrible, graphic things in addition to the voices. On the brink of tears, my husband and I decided we had no choice but to take him to the emergency room. He was admitted to the child/adolescent psychiatric unit and remained there for 9 long days. After his discharge he was placed in a day treatment program for almost 7 weeks.

The voices never really went away and the visual hallucinations occurred almost daily despite his new anti psychotic.

Almost a year later, he was hospitalized again for the same thing. He then completed another course of day treatment for 6 weeks.

A year later we still fight a battle with mood swings, rages and hallucinations. We grasp onto the hope that someday things will be easier for him. He struggles each day with school. He is in a special ed day program but has still been suspended and is not making academic progress.

It's unbelievably challenging and isolating to raise a child with special needs. I hope that with this section I can encourage parents to reach out for support and to feel that they are not alone in their struggles.

Despite the diagnosis, there is an emotional commonality for all parents. We all wrestle with doing the right things for your child and keeping your own sanity in the process.

I'd love to hear from special needs parents about their experiences and share them on this blog. The more we utilize our voices the stronger the advocacy special needs kids will be.